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6:00 AM

Close to Perfect

There's only one thing that keeps this lad from scoring a perfect ten -- he smokes. Both of my parents were heavy smokers, so it's just a huge turnoff for me. I equate smoking with an early and agonizing death. If you're wondering what that says on his cigarette pack, it translates as "smoking kills." It certainly does.

Fortunately for the bloke in the picture, he can quit now. If he finds he needs something to put in his mouth, I'll be more than happy to help him out. I'll even volunteer to keep him locked in my dungeon so he can't succumb to temptation and go buy more cigarettes.

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